


He knows her.

by lovesynlikeasin



Category: Gossip Girl (TV 2007)
Genre: Angst, Bulimia, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Eating Disorders, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Marriage, Romantic Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:55:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21526327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovesynlikeasin/pseuds/lovesynlikeasin
Summary: When Chuck Bass leaves their apartment this particular morning, he knows something is wrong. So wrong he decided to fuck up a good business deal.
Relationships: Chuck Bass/Blair Waldorf
Comments: 2
Kudos: 68





	He knows her.

They were married. So why was she holding up her hair, hunched over the porcelain? Making sure Chuck was at a busy buisness meeting. One he sure wouldn't leave. Because he didn't need to know. He didn't know how fucking pathetic she was at the moment. 

Why? 

Because Blair didn't want Chuck to blame himself. Because that's what people did when they had people close to them suffer. She knew it because that's what she felt herself; when Chuck relapsed and was deep down in a drug induced self pitying. She blamed herself. She saw him breaking out in sweat and trash their place. She blamed herself. 

Just like she knew that Chuck blamed himself when she saw her pucking up their lates dinner. Because that was what she was doing. She was puking. Just the way Chuck snorted coke. 

They were a mess; both of them. They might be wealthy; they might be important; but they were one hell of a messy couple. 

Chuck came home earlier. Not because the meeting ended earlier. He left, in the midst of the meeting. It was a important meeting. Yet, when he left home and saw her small body curled up in their bed, he knew something was up. He just knew it wasn't a good day for his wife. She hadn't said something. Blair never needed to say something. 

Not only did he love her, treasure her and all that romantic piss. He KNEW her. He knew how her muscles worked. He knew how she moved in her sleep when she was having a nightmare. He knew how she behaved when she was feeling like; well mere shit. He knew how she tried to hide anything remotely human about herself. It wasn't because he loved her. It was because he knew her damn too well. 

He unlocked the door. The sound wasn't mistakable. He knew that sound. He had; since, well they were children. When their parents forced them to visit each other. It was the sound of Blair Waldorf hating herself. A hate so deep, so deep it beat any love she held towards him; towards her mother, towards Selena. No one could beat her self hatred. This was a sound he had grown to know. A sound that had him shaken to the core since the first time; since the first time she dismissed his worry. As children. It was Chuck's first real meeting with the harsh world. The sound of the great and mighty Blair Waldorf puking her guts because she was upset she didn't fit a dress her own parents had ordered a size too small. 

His first instinct was to knock the door down, to scream at her to stop. To stop ruining herself. That she was only feeding her own insecurities. 

He knew better though. He took a deep breath. Poured himself a glass of expensive scotch. He needed it. It was egoistical; but he did need it. Then he made his way towards Blair's bathroom. 

Their pent house apartment had three bathrooms. First one was their own. The one they used for steamy shower sex; for making themselves ready for glamerous parties. The second was for their guests. Then it was their third one. Blair's bathroom. The bathroom Chuck never argued about when Blair demanded they needed no less than three bathrooms. He understood. Quietly. Never a word needed to be said. 

It was locked. Of course. Chuck Bass knew a few tricks though. Despite being Rich, Chuck Bass knew a few tricks from life's unbearable hard school. He eventually unlocked the door. 

His wife, his wonderful, bright, mean, fucking sexy wife was sitting on her knees in front of the toilette. Panting hard. One of her delicate fingers making it's way towards her mouth (her throat). Chuck gulped. He wanted to scream. He wanted to hire the best shrinks Manhatten could afford. 

Yet he only sat down on his knees next to her. His fingers over hers, taking her hair into his own hand instead of hers. He wanted to pull her close. He knew though; to wait. Let her battle her demons first. The big battle. 

The big battle which sometimes occured once a month. Sometimes once a year. Sometimes once an hour. He couldn't do anything about it. 

She puked. Making the most horrid gagging sounds. Just fucking horrible heartbreaking gagging noises. Tears streaming silently down her cheeks. Chuck Bass let her continue. 

Eventually she collapsed against his body, her body shivering from all the crying. 

He knew he did the right thing. Even if leaving this meeting lost him a great deal of money, this was far more important. SHE was far more important. She was his wife.

As he hugged her close, he wanted to chase away her demons. It was impossible though. He knew. Just like she knew it was impossible to chase away his demons when they pushed forward. They loved each other still though.  
"I'm here." he gently whispered through her messy hair, before pressing a kiss to her temple. They did occasionally talk about this. They occasionally fought about this. But not now; he just wanted to make sure she knew that no matter how shitty she felt; he was there to hold her.

The way she did for him when he was the one succumbing to his own demons.


End file.
